Tuesday, June 22, 2010

There are days

There are days when the sadness just overwhelms me and every little tiny thing makes me feel either sad or mad. Those are the days that I just don’t want to be around anybody. I need peace and quiet that just does not happen at my house. I try to get to a quiet place and am followed by at least two little feet wanting a piece of me. “What is for dinner?” “I’m bored! What can I do?” or just the proverbial noise that comes out of my 4 and 6 year old. The only time they are not making a ton of noise or getting into something is when they are asleep.

Then I am reminded of why my day is going so bad. I didn’t begin my day by spending any time with my creator.

A poem called “I didn’t have time” really sums it up. http://unsolvedmysteries.com/usm38250.html

We wake up in the morning forgetting about God and trying to live a life apart from Him. I don’t pray to Him or spend any time in His word and then I wonder why my life seems like it is spinning out of control.

How can I show God’s love to anyone when I am so far away from Him? I spend my days running around spinning my wheels, on the computer, cleaning my house or watching TV. I sometimes feel like I just don’t have the time to spend but in reality I am spending my time unwisely.

If I want to have a relationship with my husband or children or a friend, how long would that relationship last if I didn’t want to ever spend time with them or talk to them? Wouldn’t our bond be broken if I consistently did things that I knew would be a disappointment to them? If the answer is yes (and it is) then why is it that the one I claim to love the most is the one that I forget all too often and I act in a manner that brings displeasure to Him?

This continuous theme in my life needs to be changed. God has already done His part and promises - 1 john 1:9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us [our] sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

I am thinking . . maybe I need to get on my knees and do some confessing. Not for His sake but for mine.

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